Friday, June 5, 2009

Sabbath Rest

I'm busy. We're busy. Oftentimes too busy.

Our church this year is celebrating "Sabbath Rest" and taking a break from many of the programs we normally run. We are focusing on quality relationships with each other and with God. It's great in theory....but hard in practice.

Does my marriage have Sabbath Rest? I have been thinking about this lately. Being newly married brought alot of expectations to the table. We had to be disgustingly happy, having sex all the time, making a home, succeeding in our careers, having an awesome spiritual relationship together and individually, spend time with friends so they did not assume we'd "forgotten" them in our newly married bliss....and generally everything had to be rosy and wonderful. What a lot of work! And when any one of those things became less than the high expectations called for, we had to expend even more energy so things would be "ok".

Now that we're almost 4 years into it...we're still doing this I think. Now Jake and I just consume ourselves with the expectations for this next step in life and marriage...a house...a baby (no I'm not pregnant)...a retirement fund....another car...career success. When does it stop?

It stops when we decide we want it to. I think all those things are wonderful. But as I have been pondering, I have decided that they are not necessary for me to have a meaningful life or wonderful marriage. What Sabbath Rest would mean for my marriage would be for me to enjoy quiet times together of doing absolutley nothing. It would mean appreciating a fight as not something that signifies the end of the world...but rather something that brings Jake and I closer to intimacy and understanding. Can I trust God with all the expectations and enjoy the time He has given me with the people I care about in my life? That is rest I think.

The things I need to work on are spending time with people I love, spending more time with God, letting go of "where I should be in my life right now" and simply enjoying where I find myself, and trusting God to work out all the kinks...He always does :)

-Melissa

Hilarious Quote of The Week: "I'm not funny, ya wanna know why? We're going to have kids and they're going to be just like you and one day I'm going to kill myself and you'll come home and there will be a note that says 'The Kirchers Killed Me'."

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Our goal of this blog is to share stories (both good and bad), thoughts and insights about our marriage and we would love for you to jump into the conversation.

The goal is to provide three things:
1) HOPE for struggling couples that they are not alone.
2) GROWTH in our marriages and our understanding of marriage.
3) ENCOURAGEMENT to keep loving your spouse unconditionally.